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I had commented to a friend this week that they seemed to be at "half volume" lately & was wondering if they were alright... their reply: "I'm just taking things down a notch for my own sanity".

That got me to thinking... my own life has been all over the place lately, but try as I might, I can't seem to take things down a "notch" even with my own sanity on the line. With me, I'm either "on" or I'm not. And I'm fairly sure it's always been that way. I'm either raring to go or a zombie... and yes, occasionally I'm in "zombie" mode when I'm out - but that's not intentionally taking things down... that's burn-out, pure & simple. Id like to blame it on my relative inability to utter the word "no" - events, people, favors - I may hem & haw a bit, but even when it's not in my best interest, I usually give in in the end. From there it's barely a leap to the old analysis of: low self esteem, worried about disppointing others, etc, etc, etc... we've been through all that. But honestly? Even on the nights I do keep for myself? Exactly half the time I'm itching to get out, to go some place fantastic where I can drink, dance & laugh all night long. So maybe it's not all about not saying no to invites, maybe it's about not saying no to me? And maybe I ought to learn how to do that before I wind up broke with an empty gas tank and not a single laundered article of clothing to my name? Yeah. Plus it would be nice to re-do my resume, and actually LOOK for a new job, actually attempt to set my life going in an actual direction - as opposed to my "one day at a time" strategy. So yes, I probably ought to take a little more time for myself - and actually make use of that time. But I'm not so sure how I feel about "being down a notch" in general... if somethings worth doing, especially when it comes to nightlife, it's worth doing 110%.

right, so, last night....

Insanity. took me way too long to get to the Delancey - and i was scrambling as I was supposed to meet Mike there at 8 and the guys were supposed to go on by 8:30 and there's an accident on the cross bronx and ...whoa nelly, relax. it was yesterday, breathe. Right. So I walked in about 15 seconds into their first song and was thrilled to see what a great turnout they'd managed. Of course, first things first, as I scooted up through the crowd to find Jed & Brett, I was accosted with the mailing list, for, as I was informed later on in the evening, it is now my "permanent gig". ha. amusing.

The set was 10 times better than their last gig at the Mercury Lounge. The sound in the Delancey was actually a real enhancement for them. the guys were all "on", and the levels were nearly perfectly matched, and the sound in general there is a little raw. Over all, it was a little loud up close (I'm thinking that is the real reason people had been leaving y'all room to "mosh") but all the better to rock out to, right? And rock we did. A special treat was Oasis' See The Sun which as far as I know I haven't heard since the first time I saw them at Tiswas... I didn't recognize the song after that, but something tells me it wasn't new... I'll have to investigate a little further there...

Tommy Stinson - I was ready to rawk... seriously, I was, in a very raw kind of way. I mean this is what you expect when you're crammed in a basement with a couple hundred people and less than adequate a/c - in fact the only reason anyone would subjugate themselves to such conditions IS to rock out. So imagine the general malaise and disappointment when our rock hero started squeezing out pretty, melodic little ditties on his acoustic... yeah. exactly. It wasn't bad - it just wasn't RAWK. Things improved slowly as he added a second guitarist, then a bassist, a drummer & finally pulled out his electric... we danced, we rocked, we rolled on out the door.

My BFF - there's going to have to be an entire post centered around him at some point to catch everyone up to how this has become the most insane "thing" ever... It's getting to that twilight zone place, you know? And it's likely that he'll be at Curiosa too, so, in any event - the phrase, "we have to stop meeting like this" is getting overused.

Now, there's also a whole nother half of the night that took place at Bar 13. Jed and I joked last night about how we would have identical posts today... which, had I posted my original draft, would have been the case. Instead, allow me to direct you here for an amusing description of what Bar 13 held in store for us.

Shout Outs:

Mike... babe, what in the hell happened to you? You & Ed vanished into the night! Were you eaten alive by starving hipsters? Anyhow... find me & let me know you're alive? I'm glad you made it out - next time you should try a show - they're relatively painless, I promise!

Gabe... welcome aboard ;) And seriously, your timing is impeccable - that may have been the single most hysterical moment of my summer.

I'm sure there's more, but I'm tired and it's Friday & I'm just DYING to go & sit in some traffic, so peace out sukkahs, tonight it's Benzos & Asobi @ The Merc, tomorrow Robert Smith serenades me at Curiosa.