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I believe in a thing called love...

Ah. Friday the 13th. Valentine's Day. President's Day. All wrapped up in one neat little weekend... can you COUNT the number of ways my precariously balanced life is sure to go terribly terribly wrong? Mmmn Hmmn. First off, I am spending almost the entire weekend in Manhattan. Tonight I'll be at the Bowery for South / Metric / Pity Sing. Tomorrow night I'll be at Irving for The Shins (I know, I know... but MSCL can wait. My darling Jill has graciously offered to be my Valentine & I'm going to find a way to work a Chocolate Martini into the equation somewhere), and then Sunday I'll be stalking Audrey - first at "The Day After" and then while she DJ's "Modern Snack Bar" at Filter 14. So - that's a lot of time to spend in the ity-bity indie circle I find myself these days, and I'm bound to run into an assortment of the alphanumerics, and with my luck - it'll be simultaneously. I'm just saying it now so that if any of you are there to witness it, you can not only giggle at my misfortune, but marvel at my incredible pre-cognitive abilities as well.

Right so, lets have a Valentine's day rant, shall we? Excellent.
What exactly is it about this holiday that send men screaming for the hills? Yes, it's a lot of pressure to put on anyone... a specific day earmarked for romance - but come on guys! Suck it up! If you're in a relationship, BE a little romantic. Is it really going to kill you to show your girl how you feel? I mean, seriously... a card, some flowers, dinner reservations - candy or jewelry depending on your cash flow situation? This is not rocket science. It's a formula that has worked for like, hundreds of years. As for the single guys? Any invitation to spend time with a girl on VD is NOT a fucking marriage proposal. Nor does it require any sort of floral arrangements. Get. Over. Yourself. Thank You. I mean this year VD is on a Saturday, so what are the non-coupled supposed to do? All sit home on our asses to collectively avoid looking like more couples? Screw that! If you're in a weird kinda-sorta-we're-not-defined thing? Well then you already have problems on a more regular basis now don't you? Um, your guess is as good as mine. Get her flowers anyways, maybe pink if you're squeamish about what red might represent, it can't screw things up anymore than not getting her anything would... /rant

In the meantime, I'd like to express my horror over this. Talk about shaking a girl's faith in the nature of relationships. I could get into what kind of liberal, feminist, progressive CRAP is behind it - but I'll going to spare you. Instead, I offer you the following diatribe which will describe in excruciatingly hysterical detail, approximately half the men I've ever dated. So BEST evs. (hmmn – I'm not really sure the blogging lingo works for me… what do you think?)

Anyhow… cross your fingers for me this weekend – lord knows I'm going to need all the help I can get ;)